The Delights of Wisdom Pertaining to Conjugial Love · Chapter 6Preliminary Relations Respecting the Joys of Heaven and Nuptials There. (5)
This chapter is not translated yet. You are reading the original.
43. After this I saw an angel from that heaven holding in his hand a roll of parchment, which he unfolded, saying, "I see that you are meditating on conjugial love; in this parchment are contained arcana of wisdom respecting that love, which have never yet been disclosed in the world. They are now to be disclosed, because it is of importance that they should be: those arcana abound more in our heaven than in the rest, because we are in the marriage of love and wisdom; but I prophesy that none will appropriate to themselves that love, but those who are received by the Lord into the New Church, which is the New Jerusalem." Having said this, the angel let down the unfolded parchment, which a certain angelic spirit received from him, and laid on a table in a certain closet, which he instantly locked, and holding out the key to me, said, "Write."
44. THE SECOND MEMORABLE RELATION. I once saw three spirits recently deceased, who were wandering about in the world of spirits, examining whatever came in their way, and inquiring concerning it. They were all amazement to find that men lived altogether as before, and that the objects they saw were similar to those they had seen before: for they knew that they were departed out of the former or natural world, and that in that world they believed that they should not live as men until after the day of the last judgement, when they should be again clothed with the flesh and bones that had been laid in the tomb; therefore, in order to remove all doubt of their being really and truly men, they by turns viewed and touched themselves and others, and felt the surrounding objects and by a thousand proofs convinced themselves that they now were men as in the former world; besides which they saw each other in a brighter light, and the surrounding objects in superior splendor, and thus their vision was more perfect. At that instant two angelic spirits happening to meet them, accosted them, saying, "Whence are you?" They replied, "We have departed out of a world, and again we live in a world; thus we have removed from one world to another; and this surprises us." Hereupon the three novitiate spirits questioned the two angelic spirits concerning heaven; and as two of the three novitiates were youths, and there darted from their eyes as it were a sparkling fire of lust for the sex, the angelic spirit said, "Possibly you have seen some females;" and they replied in the affirmative; and as they made inquiry respecting heaven, the angelic spirits gave them the following information: "In heaven there is every variety of magnificent and splendid objects, and such things as the eye had never seen; there are also virgins and young men; virgins of such beauty that they may be called personifications of beauty, and young men of such morality that they may be called personifications of morality; moreover the beauty of the virgins and the morality of the young men correspond to each other, as forms mutually suited to each other." Hereupon the two novitiates asked, "Are there in heaven human forms altogether similar to those in the natural world?" And it was replied, "They are altogether similar; nothing is wanting in the male, and nothing in the female; in a word, the male is a male, and the female a female, in all the perfection of form in which they were created: retire, if you please, and examine if you are deficient in anything, and whether you are not a complete man as before." Again, the novitiates said, "We have been told in the world we have left, that in heaven they are not given in marriage, because they are angels:—is there then the love of the sex there?" And the angelic spirits replied, "In heaven your love of the sex does not exist; but we have the angelic love of the sex, which is chaste, and devoid all libidinous allurement." Hereupon the novitiates observed, "If there be a love of the sex devoid of all allurement, what in such cases is the love of the sex?" And while they were thinking about this love they sighed, and said, "Oh, how dry and insipid is the joy of heaven! What young man, if this be the case, can possibly wish for heaven? Is not such love barren and devoid of life?" To this the angelic spirits replied, with a smile, "The angelic love of the sex, such as exists in heaven, is nevertheless full of the inmost delights: it is the most agreeable expansion of all the principles of the mind, and thence of all the parts of the breast, existing inwardly in the breast, and sporting therein as the heart sports with the lungs, giving birth thereby to respiration, tone of voice, and speech; so that the intercourse between the sexes, or between youths and virgins, is an intercourse of essential celestial sweets, which are pure. All novitiates, on ascending into heaven, are examined as to the quality of their chastity, being let into the company of virgins, the beauties of heaven, who from their tone of voice, their speech, their face, their eyes, their gesture, and their exhaling sphere, perceive what is their quality in regard to the love of the sex; and if their love be unchaste, they instantly quit them, and tell their fellow angels that they have seen satyrs or priapuses. The new comers also undergo a change, and in the eyes of the angels appear rough and hairy, and with feet like calves' or leopards', and presently they are cast down again, lest by their lust they should defile the heavenly atmosphere." On receiving this information, the two novitiates again said, "According to this, there is no love of the sex in heaven; for what is a chaste love of the sex, but a love deprived of the essence of its life? And must not all the intercourse of youths and virgins, in such case, consist of dry insipid joys? We are not stocks and stones, but perceptions and affections of life." To this the angelic spirits indignantly replied, "You are altogether ignorant what a chaste love of the sex is; because as yet you are not chaste. This love is the very essential delight of the mind, and thence of the heart; and not at the same time of the flesh beneath the heart. Angelic chastity, which is common to each sex, prevents the passage of that love beyond the enclosure of the heart; but within that and above it, the morality of a youth is delighted with the beauty of a virgin in the delights of the chaste love of the sex: which delights are of too interior a nature, and too abundantly pleasant, to admit of any description in words. The angels have this love of the sex, because they have conjugial love only; which love cannot exist together with the unchaste love of the sex. Love truly conjugial is chaste, and has nothing in common with unchaste love, being confined to one of the sex, and separate from all others; for it is a love of the spirit and thence of the body, and not a love of the body and thence of the spirit; that is, it is not a love infesting the spirit." On hearing this, the two young novitiates rejoiced, and said, "There still exists in heaven a love of the sex; what else is conjugial love?" But the angelic spirits replied, "Think more profoundly, weigh the matter well in your minds, and you will perceive, that your love of the sex is a love extra-conjugial, and quite different from conjugial love; the latter being as distinct from the former, as wheat is from chaff, or rather as the human principle is from the bestial. If you should ask the females in heaven, 'What is love extra-conjugial?' I take upon me to say, their reply will be, 'What do you mean? What do you say? How can you utter a question which so wounds our ears? How can a love that is not created be implanted in any one?' If you should then ask them, 'What is love truly conjugial?' I know they will reply, 'It is not the love of the sex, but the love of one of the sex; and it has no other ground of existence than this, that when a youth sees a virgin provided by the Lord, and a virgin sees a youth, they are each made sensible of a conjugial principle kindling in their hearts, and perceive that each is the other's, he hers, and she his; for love meets love and causes them to know each other, and instantly conjoins their souls, and afterwards their minds, and thence enters their bosoms, and after the nuptials penetrates further, and thus becomes love in its fulness, which grows every day into conjunction, till they are no longer two, but as it were one.' I know also that they will be ready to affirm in the most solemn manner, that they are not acquainted with any other love of the sex; for they say, 'How can there be a love of the sex, unless it be tending mutually to meet, and reciprocal, so as to seek an eternal union, which consists in two becoming one flesh?'" To this the angelic spirits added, "In heaven they are in total ignorance what whoredom is; nor do they know that it exists, or that its existence is even possible. The angels feel a chill all over the body at the idea of unchaste or extra-conjugial love; and on the other hand, they feel a genial warmth throughout the body arising from chaste or conjugial love. With the males, all the nerves lose their proper tension at the sight of a harlot, and recover it again at the sight of a wife." The three novitiates, on hearing this, asked, "Does a similar love exist between married partners in the heavens as in the earths?" The two angelic spirits replied, that it was altogether similar; and as they perceived in the novitiates an inclination to know, whether in heaven there were similar ultimate delights, they said, that they were exactly similar, but much more blessed, because angelic perception and sensation is much more exquisite than human: "and what," added they, "is the life of that love unless derived from a flow of vigor? When this vigor fails, must not the love itself also fail and grow cold? Is not this vigor the very measure, degree, and basis of that love? Is it not its beginning, its support, and its fulfilment? It is a universal law, that things primary exist, subsist, and persist from things ultimate: this is true also of that love; therefore unless there were ultimate delights, there would be no delights of conjugial love." The novitiates then asked, whether from the ultimate delights of that love in heaven any offspring were produced; and if not, to what use did those delights serve? The angelic spirit answered, that natural offspring were not produced, but spiritual offspring: and the novitiates said, "What are spiritual offspring?" They replied, "Two conjugial partners by ultimate delights are more and more united in the marriage of good and truth, which is the marriage of love and wisdom; and love and wisdom are the offspring produced therefrom: in heaven the husband is wisdom, and the wife is the love thereof, and both are spiritual; therefore, no other than spiritual offspring can be there conceived and born: hence it is that the angels, after such delights, do not experience sadness, as some do on earth, but are cheerful; and this in consequence of a continual influx of fresh powers succeeding the former, which serve for their renovation, and at the same time illustration: for all who come into heaven, return into their vernal youth, and into the vigor of that age, and thus continue to eternity." The three novitiates, on hearing this, said, "Is it not written in the Word, that in heaven they are not given in marriage, because they are angels?" To which the angelic spirits replied, "Look up into heaven and you will receive an answer:" and they asked, "Why are we to look up into heaven?" They said, "Because thence we receive all interpretations of the Word. The Word is altogether spiritual and the angels being spiritual, will teach the spiritual understanding of it." They did not wait long before heaven was opened over their heads, and two angels appeared in view, and said, "There are nuptials in the heavens, as on earth; but only with those in the heavens who are in the marriage of good and truth; nor are any other angels: therefore it is spiritual nuptials, which relate to the marriage of good and truth, that are there understood. These (viz. spiritual nuptials) take place on earth, but not after departure thence, thus not in the heavens; as it is said of the live foolish virgins, who were also invited to the nuptials, that they could not enter, because they were not in the marriage of good and truth; for they had no oil, but only lamps. Oil signifies good, and lamps truth; and to be given in marriage denotes to enter heaven, where the marriage of good and truth takes place." The three novitiates were made glad by this intelligence; and being filled with a desire of heaven, and with the hope of heavenly nuptials, they said, "We will apply ourselves with all diligence to the practice of morality and a becoming conduct of life, that we may enjoy our wishes."
ON THE STATE OF MARRIED PARTNERS AFTER DEATH.
45. That there are marriages in the heavens, has been shewn just above; it remains now to be considered, whether the marriage-covenant ratified in the world will remain and be in force after death, or not. As this is a question not of judgement but of experience, and as experience herein has been granted me by consociation with angels and spirits, I will here adduce it; but yet so that reason may assent thereto. To have this question determined, is also an object of the wishes and desires of all married persons; for husbands who have loved their wives, in case they die, are desirous to know whether it be well with them, and whether they shall ever meet again; and the same is true of wives in regard to their husbands. Many married pairs also wish to know beforehand whether they are to be separated after death, or to live together: those who have disagreed in their tempers, wish to know whether they are to be separated; and those who have agreed, whether they are to live together. Information on this subject then being much wished for, we will now proceed to give it in the following order: I. The love of the sex remains with every man (homo) after death, according to its interior quality; that is, such as it had been in his interior will and thought in the world. II. The same is true of conjugial love. III. Married partners most commonly meet after death, know each other, again associate and for a time live together: this is the case in the first state, thus while they are in externals as in the world. IV. But successively, as they put off their externals, and enter into their internals, they perceive what had been the quality of their love and inclination for each other, and consequently whether they can live together or not. V. If they can live together, they remain married partners; but if they cannot they separate; sometimes the husband from the wife, sometimes the wife from the husband, and sometimes each from the other. VI. In this case there is given to the man a suitable wife, and to the woman a suitable husband. VII. Married partners enjoy similar communications with each other as in the world, but more delightful and blessed, yet without prolification; in the place of which they experience spiritual prolification, which is that of love and wisdom. VIII. This is the case with those who go to heaven; but it is otherwise with those who go to hell. We now proceed to an explanation of these propositions, by which they may be illustrated and confirmed.
46. I. THE LOVE OF THE SEX REMAINS WITH EVERY MAN AFTER DEATH, ACCORDING TO ITS INTERIOR QUALITY; THAT IS, SUCH AS IT HAD BEEN IN HIS INTERIOR WILL AND THEREBY IN THE WOMAN. Every love follows a man after death, because it is the esse of his life; and the ruling love, which is the head of the rest, remains with him to eternity, and together with it the subordinate loves. The reason why they remain, is, because love properly appertains to the spirit of man, and to the body by derivation from the spirit; and a man after death becomes a spirit and thereby carries his love along with him; as love is the esse of a man's life, it is evident, that such as a man's life has been in the world, such is his lot after death. The love of the sex is the most universal of all loves, being implanted from creation in the very soul of man, from which the essence of the whole man is derived, and this for the sake of the propagation of the human race. The reason why this love chiefly remains is, because after death a male is a male, and a female a female, and because there is nothing in the soul, the mind, and the body, which is not male (or masculine) in the male, and female (or feminine) in the female; and these two (the male and female) are so created, that they have a continual tendency to conjunction, yea, to such a conjunction as to become a one. This tendency is the love of the sex, which precedes conjugial love. Now, since a conjunctive inclination is inscribed on every part and principle of the male and of the female, it follows, that this inclination cannot be destroyed and die with the body.
47. The reason why the love of the sex remains such as it was interiorly in the world, is, because every man has an internal and an external, which are also called the internal and external man; and hence there is an internal and an external will and thought. A man when he dies, quits his external, and retains his internal; for externals properly belong to his body, and internals to his spirit. Now since every man is his own love, and love resides in the spirit, it follows, that the love of the sex remains with him after death, such as it was interiorly with him; as for example, if the love interiorly had been conjugial and chaste, it remains such after death; but if it had been interiorly adulterous (anti-conjugial), it remains such also after death. It is however to be observed that the love of the sex is not the same with one person as with another; its differences are infinite: nevertheless, such as it is in any one's spirit, such it remains.
48. II. CONJUGIAL LOVE IN LIKE MANNER REMAINS SUCH AS IT HAD BEEN INTERIORLY; THAT IS, SUCH AS IT HAD BEEN IN THE MAN'S INTERIOR WILL AND THOUGHT IN THE WORLD. As the love of the sex is one thing, and conjugial love another, therefore mention is made of each; and it is said, that the latter also remains after death such as it has been internally with a man, during his abode in the world: but as few know the distinction between the love of the sex and conjugial love, therefore, before we proceed further in the subject of this treatise, it may be expedient briefly to point it out. The love of the sex is directed to several, and contracted with several of the sex; but conjugial love is directed to only one, and contracted with one of the sex; moreover, love directed to and contracted with several is a natural love; for it is common to man with beasts and birds, which are natural: but conjugial love is a spiritual love, and peculiar and proper to men; because men were created, and are therefore born to become spiritual; therefore, so far as a man becomes spiritual, so far he puts off the love of the sex, and puts on conjugial love. In the beginning of marriage the love of the sex appears as if conjoined with conjugial love; but in the progress of marriage they are separated; and in this case, with such as are spiritual, the love of the sex is removed, and conjugial love is imparted; but with such as are natural, the contrary happens. From these observations it is evident, that the love of the sex, being directed to and contracted with several and being in itself natural, yea, animal, is impure and unchaste, and being vague and indeterminate in its object, is adulterous; but the case is altogether different with conjugial love. That conjugial love is spiritual, and truly human, will manifestly appear from what follows.
[Transcriber's Note: The out-of-order section numbers which follow are in the original text, as are the asterisks which do not seem to indicate footnotes. There are several cases of this in the text, apparently indicating insertions by the author.]
47.* III. MARRIED PARTNERS MOST COMMONLY MEET AFTER DEATH, KNOW EACH OTHER, AGAIN ASSOCIATE, AND FOR A TIME LIVE TOGETHER: THIS IS THE CASE IN THE FIRST STATE, THUS WHILE THEY ARE IN EXTERNALS AS IN THE WORLD. There are two states in which a man (homo) enters after death, an external and an internal state. He comes first into his external state, and afterwards into his internal; and during the external state, married partners meet each other, (supposing they are both deceased,) know each other, and if they have lived together in the world, associate again, and for some time live together; and while they are in this state they do not know the inclination of each to the other, this being concealed in the internals of each; but afterwards, when they come into their internal state, the inclination manifests itself; and if it be in mutual agreement and sympathy, they continue to live together a conjugial life; but if it be in disagreement and antipathy, their marriage is dissolved. In case a man had had several wives, he successively joins himself with them, while he is in his external state; but when he enters into his internal state, in which lie perceives the inclinations of his love, and of what quality they are, he then either adopts one or leaves them all; for in the spiritual world, as well as in the natural, it is not allowable for any Christian to have more than one wife, as it infests and profanes religion. The case is the same with a woman that had had several husbands: nevertheless the women in this case do not join themselves to their husbands; they only present themselves, and the husbands join them to themselves. It is to be observed that husbands rarely know their wives, but that wives well know their husbands, women having an interior perception of love, and men only an exterior.
48.* IV. BUT SUCCESSIVELY, AS THEY PUT OFF THEIR EXTERNALS AND ENTER INTO THEIR INTERNALS, THEY PERCEIVE WHAT HAD BEEN THE QUALITY OF THEIR LOVE AND INCLINATION FOR EACH OTHER, AND CONSEQUENTLY WHETHER THEY CAN LIVE TOGETHER OR NOT. There is no occasion to explain this further, as it follows from what is shewn in the previous section; suffice it here to shew how a man (homo) after death puts off his externals and puts on his internals. Every one after death is first introduced into the world which is called the world of spirits, and which is intermediate between heaven and hell; and in that world he is prepared, for heaven if he is good, and for hell if he is evil. The end or design of this preparation is, that the internal and external may agree together and make a one, and not disagree and make two: in the natural world they frequently make two, and only make a one with those who are sincere in heart. That they make two is evident from the deceitful and the cunning; especially from hypocrites, flatterers, dissemblers, and liars: but in the spiritual world it is not allowable thus to have a divided mind; for whoever has been internally wicked must also be externally wicked; in like manner, whoever has been good, must be good in each principle: for every man after death becomes of such a quality as he had been interiorly, and not such as he had been exteriorly. For this end, after his decease, he is let alternately into his external and his internal; and every one, while he is in his external, is wise, that is, he wishes to appear wise, even though he be wicked; but a wicked person internally is insane. By those changes he is enabled to see his follies, and to repent of them: but if he had not repented in the world, he cannot afterwards; for he loves his follies, and wishes to remain in them: therefore he forces his external also to be equally insane: thus his internal and his external become a one; and when this is effected, he is prepared for hell. But it is otherwise with a good spirit: such a one, as in the world he had looked unto God and had repented, was more wise in his internal than in his external: in his external also, through the allurements and vanities of the world, he was sometimes led astray; therefore his external is likewise reduced to agreement with his internal, which, as was said, is wise; and when this is effected he is prepared for heaven. From these considerations it may plainly appear, how the case is in regard to putting off the external and putting on the internal after death.
49. V. IF THEY CAN LIVE TOGETHER, THEY REMAIN MARRIED PARTNERS; BUT IF THEY CANNOT, THEY SEPARATE; SOMETIMES THE HUSBAND FROM THE WIFE, SOMETIMES THE WIFE FROM THE HUSBAND, AND SOMETIMES EACH FROM THE OTHER. The reason why separations take place after death is, because the conjunctions which are made on earth are seldom made from any internal perception of love, but from an external perception, which hides the internal. The external perception of love originates in such things as regard the love of the world and of the body. Wealth and large possessions are peculiarly the objects of worldly love, while dignities and honors are those of the love of the body: besides these objects, there are also various enticing allurements, such as beauty and an external polish of manners, and sometimes even an unchasteness of character. Moreover, matrimonial engagements are frequently contracted within the particular district, city, or village, in which the parties were born, and where they live; in which case the choice is confined and limited to families that are known, and to such as are in similar circumstances in life: hence matrimonial connections made in the world are for the most part external, and not at the same time internal; when yet it is the internal conjunction, or the conjunction of souls, which constitutes a real marriage; and this conjunction is not perceivable until the man puts off the external and puts on the internal; as is the case after death. This then is the reason why separations take place, and afterwards new conjunctions are formed with such as are of a similar nature and disposition; unless these conjunctions have been provided on earth, as happens with those who from an early age have loved, have desired, and have asked of the Lord an honorable and lovely connection with one of the sex, shunning and abominating the impulses of a loose and wandering lust.
50. VI. IN THIS CASE THERE IS GIVEN TO THE MAN A SUITABLE WIFE, AND TO THE WOMAN A SUITABLE HUSBAND. The reason of this is, because no married partners can be received into heaven, so as to remain there, but such as have been interiorly united, or as are capable of being so united; for in heaven two married partners are not called two, but one angel; this is understood by the Lord's words "They are no longer two, but one flesh." The reason why no other married partners are there received is, because in heaven no others can live together in one house, and in one chamber and bed; for all in the heavens are associated according to the affinities and relationships of love, and have their habitations accordingly. In the spiritual world there are not spaces, but the appearance of spaces; and these appearances are according to the states of life of the inhabitants, which are according to their states of love; therefore in that world no one can dwell but in his own house, which is provided for him and assigned to him according to the quality of his love: if he dwells in any other, he is straitened and pained in his breast and breathing; and it is impossible for two to dwell together in the same house unless they are likenesses; neither can married partners so dwell together, unless they are mutual inclinations; if they are external inclinations, and not at the same time internal, the very house or place itself separates, and rejects and expels them. This is the reason why for those who after preparation are introduced into heaven, there is provided a marriage with a consort whose soul inclines to mutual union with the soul of another, so that they no longer wish to be two lives, but one. This is the reason why after separation there is given to the man a suitable wife and to the woman in like manner a suitable husband.